COUp’s First Schedule Ever!

“COUP’s first schedule ever” (Fall ’97?)

Archiver’s note: Contrary to popular belief, this is not actually COUp’s first schedule. This is a parody schedule written by Phil Lee which imagines what the club might have been like if it existed in 1987.

Hi there, and welcome to the Carolina Otaku Uprising! We’re not really sure why the word “otaku” is in the title – as far as we know, it’s a really formal way of referring to someone – but some guy showed up and promised us it’s a really cool name. Whatever.

We’re a club dedicated to watching Japanimation. You know, those really cool Japanese cartoons? If you’ve ever watched Robotech or Starblazers, you’ve been watching Japanimation. It’s really cool! There’s violence and everything! It’s amazing!

We’ll meet every Tuesday from 7-10pm (or whenever) in the basement of the Student Union. Unless specified, everything shown is on VHS, though we occasionally have to drag over the Betamax machine. (Oh, and though it’s not an official meeting, some folks gather every weekday in the student union at 5:30 to watch Robotech, so drop on by.)

We’ll be watching three regular series at every meeting: Dirty Pair, Zeta Gundam and Patarillo. Dirty Pair is about these two anime babes who are intergalactic cops, armed with big guns and skimpy uniforms. There’s lots of SF parodies, wacky comedy and gratuitous violence. Zeta Gundam is about this guy named Char, his red robot, and how he’s the baddest mother in the universe. It’s the greatest giant robot TV show ever. I don’t know what Patarillo is about, but our female club officer threatened violence if she didn’t get her “Ban-chan” fix every week. Whatever it is, it sounds pretty cool. Maybe it’s got women in space bikinis.

Unfortunatly, none of these shows are translated, but we found this Japanese guy named Ma-chan who promises to show up and provide some running comentary on what’s happening. At any rate, here’s the rest of the schedule:

9/15 – Dirty Pair: Project Eden – We’ll kick off the semester with the brand new Dirty Pair movie! Hot damn! It’s a bit more serious than the regular Dirty Pair and looks absolutely lovely.

9/22 – Bubblegum Crisis 1 and 2 – Don’t let the name fool you – this is the coolest anime series ever. Hardcore cyberpunk, incredible rock music, women in power armor blowing away cyborgs…it’s totally awesome. Man, if someone could get the rights to release this here in the US, I’ll bet they could make a lot of money.

9/29 – Megazone 23 – Really cool SF, with the best animation soundtrack since Rock ‘N Rule. And, the guy who did the character designs for Robotech worked on this show, so it’s really cool. You guys are going to love Eve. And, our copy is on Betamax, so it’ll look great!

10/6 – Megazone 23 Part 2 – On the one hand, this has a completely different look from the first movie, which is kinda disappointing. On the other hand, there’s this babe called Dump that you’ve just gotta see. Also on Betamax, for extra quality!

10/13 – Retro Night! We’ve got a couple of episodes of Science Ninja Team Gatchaman (better known as Battle of the Planets to most of you). Trust me, it’s much better in Japanese. We’ll also pop in an episode of Speed Racer, just for laughs.

10/20 – Lupin the Third: Cagliostro’s Castle – I don’t know what this is, but Ma-chan swore up and down that it was really great, so we’re going to watch it.

10/27 – Giant Robot Night! – A friend got me a tape called “Gold Raitan” and told me it was this really cool giant robot show. I haven’t had a chance to watch it yet, but what the hell – we’re showing it anyway. I mean, it’s got giant robots in it, so how bad could it be?

11/3 – Urusei Yatsura Movie 2: Only Yesterday – More fun with the most lecherous guy in Japan and his flying, electrifying, bikini-clad would-be wife. In case you hadn’t noticed, we like shows that star women in bikinis.

11/10 – Sports Night! – We’re watching an episode of this old boxing anime called Ashita no Joe, an episode of an old women’s tennis series called Ace o Nerae, and an episode of this new baseball series called Touch. Yeah, I know, it sounds goofy, but they’re pretty cool shows.

11/17 – Arcadia of my Youth – If anyone in the anime universe is even cooler than Char, it’s Space Pirate Captain Harlock. This is a feature film from a few years ago and it’s just amazingly cool. It’s also by the same guy who did Starblazers, so if you like that, you’ve gotta see this.

11/24 – Double Feature! – First is this direct to video show called Black Magic M-66, which is about a sort of female version of the Terminator. It rocks. Then, we’ve got a special suprise episode of the Dirty Pair fan-dubbed by these guys called Pinesalad Productions. You have to see it to believe it.

12/8 – Macross: Do You Remember Love – That’s right, it’s a special treat for all you Robotech fans…particularly the bit where Rick Hunter smacks Minmay!

And there you have it! If you’ve never seen Japanimation, you should really come by and check it out. Hope to see you at the first meeting!

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Phil “Now, that’s a schedule!” Lee